What have I done
I wish I could run
Away from this ship going under
Just trying to help
Hurt everyone else
Now I feel the weight of the world is
On my shoulders
What can you do when your good isn't good enough
And all that you touch tumbles down
'Cuz my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just want to fix it somehow
But how many times will it take
Oh how many times will it take for me
To get it right
To get it right
Can I start again
With my faith shaken
'Cuz I can't go back and undo this
I just have to stay
And face my mistakes
But if I get stronger and wiser
I'll get through this
What can you do when your good isn't good enough
And all that you touch tumbles down
'Cuz my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just want to fix it somehow
But how many times will it take
But how many times will it take for me
To get it right
So I throw up my fist, throw a punch in the air
And accept the truth that sometimes life isn't fair
Yeah I sent out wish
Yeah I sent up a prayer
Then finally someone will see how much I care
What can you do when your good isn't good enough
And all that you touch tumbles down
Oh my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just want to fix it somehow
But how many times will it take
Oh how many times will it take
To get it right
To get it right
-- Get It Right, Glee Cast
12 July 2011
08 May 2011
Preface, Number 2
A person wins by doing/being the best, not by destructive, betraying or hurtful actions.
07 May 2011
My song of the day....
In the next couple of days, I'll be post some pretty personal and, shall we say, some pretty colorful entries. I preface all of that with this song, Fuckin' Perfect, by Pink. Even though I have my faults, I am still perfect. I am good enough. I should trust myself to do what I need to do and make the decisions I need to make for myself and my own happiness. Fuck everyone else.
Made a wrong turn, once or twice.
Dug my way out, blood and fire.
Bad decisions, that's alright.
Welcome to my silly life.
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood.
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down.
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated.
Look, I'm still around.
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing,
You're fuckin' perfect to me
You're so mean when you talk about yourself; you were wrong.
Change the voices in your head; make them like you instead.
So complicated, look happy, you'll make it
Filled with so much hatred, such a tired game.
It's enough; I've done all I can think of.
Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same.
Woah ohh, pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing,
You're fuckin' perfect to me.
The whole world's scared so I swallow the fear.
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer.
So cool in line, and we try try try, but we try too hard and it's a waste of my time.
Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere.
They dont like my jeans; they don't get my hair.
Exchange ourselves, and we do it all the time.
Why do we do that? Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?
Yeah, oh, oh baby, pretty baby
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty,pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing, you're fuckin' perfect to me, yeahhh.
You're perfect, you're perfect
Ohh pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel, like you're nothing
You're fuckin' perfect to me
Made a wrong turn, once or twice.
Dug my way out, blood and fire.
Bad decisions, that's alright.
Welcome to my silly life.
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood.
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down.
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated.
Look, I'm still around.
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing,
You're fuckin' perfect to me
You're so mean when you talk about yourself; you were wrong.
Change the voices in your head; make them like you instead.
So complicated, look happy, you'll make it
Filled with so much hatred, such a tired game.
It's enough; I've done all I can think of.
Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same.
Woah ohh, pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing,
You're fuckin' perfect to me.
The whole world's scared so I swallow the fear.
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer.
So cool in line, and we try try try, but we try too hard and it's a waste of my time.
Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere.
They dont like my jeans; they don't get my hair.
Exchange ourselves, and we do it all the time.
Why do we do that? Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?
Yeah, oh, oh baby, pretty baby
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty,pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing, you're fuckin' perfect to me, yeahhh.
You're perfect, you're perfect
Ohh pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel, like you're nothing
You're fuckin' perfect to me
21 April 2011
To my lawmakers in Washington
Are you slashing the budget because you can, or are you actually thinking about what you're slashing. As it is, it comes across as your efforts are blind and arbitrary, without concern to consequence or results.
I'm totally for fiscal responsibility, however, you are not even cutting the budget wisely. Medicare unavailable to those born after 1957? Are you on crack? Cutting Planned Parenthood funding, even though abortion isn't paid for by federal funding? Are you stupid? Cutting NPR funding because their independent reporting exposes the Republican and their misguided Tea Party followers for the dumbasses that they really are. Are you dumbasses too? Going after the Health Care Act, when you're still getting government health insurance? Hypocritical, isn't that?
I strongly resent the GOP and the Tea Partiers for their antics in destroying the country. Again, totally for fiscal responsibility, but even that has to be managed with care.
Grrr.... Too bad we in Florida can't recall our federal representatives in Congress.
I'm totally for fiscal responsibility, however, you are not even cutting the budget wisely. Medicare unavailable to those born after 1957? Are you on crack? Cutting Planned Parenthood funding, even though abortion isn't paid for by federal funding? Are you stupid? Cutting NPR funding because their independent reporting exposes the Republican and their misguided Tea Party followers for the dumbasses that they really are. Are you dumbasses too? Going after the Health Care Act, when you're still getting government health insurance? Hypocritical, isn't that?
I strongly resent the GOP and the Tea Partiers for their antics in destroying the country. Again, totally for fiscal responsibility, but even that has to be managed with care.
Grrr.... Too bad we in Florida can't recall our federal representatives in Congress.
I hate tourists
I resent risking my life driving to work, where I have to 'create magic' for ungrateful, pissy and angry tourists with unrealistic expectataions. Learn how to drive, goddammit, as I'm over unsafe driving.
Oh yeah, if you want coffee that tastes like the crap you drink back home, or Starbucks products, you can just get the fuck home, or go use your GPS and get your sorry ass to a Starbucks. It will taste better, for a lot less than we're charging you for.
I love my job, as my co-workers and the tourists that are grateful that we are here for them make it all worth while. It's just the ones that are a pain, can ruin a day.
Oh yeah, if you want coffee that tastes like the crap you drink back home, or Starbucks products, you can just get the fuck home, or go use your GPS and get your sorry ass to a Starbucks. It will taste better, for a lot less than we're charging you for.
I love my job, as my co-workers and the tourists that are grateful that we are here for them make it all worth while. It's just the ones that are a pain, can ruin a day.
20 April 2011
To certain people....
So, our friends that feel that we are no longer worthy of your presence....
Would be nice if you told us why before we find ourselves cut off, or out of favor with you.
Totally understand that people move on to greatness. But don't forget those who were friends before you found it.
Not bitter, not angry. However friends share their victories and defeats with each other.
Would be nice if you told us why before we find ourselves cut off, or out of favor with you.
Totally understand that people move on to greatness. But don't forget those who were friends before you found it.
Not bitter, not angry. However friends share their victories and defeats with each other.
17 April 2011
I dedicate this song, Chester....
I dedicate this song to all those who are fighting for their freedom, in the Mideast, the Sudan, Burma and elsewhere.... Courage!
- Let tyrants shake their iron rod,
- And Slav'ry clank her galling chains,
- We fear them not, we trust in God,
- New England's God forever reigns.
- When God inspir'd us for the fight,
- Their ranks were broke, their lines were forc'd,
- Their ships were Shatter'd in our sight,
- Or swiftly driven from our Coast.
- The Foe comes on with haughty Stride;
- Our troops advance with martial noise,
- Their Vet'rans flee before our Youth,
- And Gen'rals yield to beardless Boys.
- What grateful Off'ring shall we bring?
- What shall we render to the Lord?
- Loud Halleluiahs let us Sing,
- And praise his name on ev'ry Chord.
-
- --Chester, William Billings
14 April 2011
So, it's been a while since I've written something
Yeah, I need to write more often.
So, I went to Seattle, moved the shop, getting ready to declare bankruptcy, broker than hell. And so f-ing down about a lot of stuff. Had a couple of auditions, got cast in a piece of shit play, but got totally screwed over by a really bad script, and a director that doesn't have a clue how to do her job, for which I professionally and quickly dropped out. Just commemorated my mom's 10th anniversary of her death. Stuck at a low paying job with no prospects in the immediate future. Ocean Park is about to fuck me over again, I think. Dumbass chinks. Trying not to be a victim, but circumstances make it hard not to fall into that hole. It is so hard to climb out of a hole when you've been kicked repeatedly. I mean, why bother to get up?
Then there's politics. The federal budget debate hung up by a bunch of mis-informed idiots, that think that Planned Parenthood funds abortion, even though that aspect of PP's operations is not funded by the federal government. The Tea Partiers -- or should I say Tea Baggers, named after sucking one's ejaculation out of a condom -- think they have free run over determining public policy. Sarah Palin should win "Righteous Cunt of the Year" for running her mouth. Then our dumbass governor decides its a good thing not to build light rail, and blindly cutting the budget, then has the audacity to claim credit for helping out in the federal budget impasse. And Obama needs to grow a pair.
Nonetheless, this is what you've missed thus far. It's safe to assume that I don't feel all that great about things right now.
So, I went to Seattle, moved the shop, getting ready to declare bankruptcy, broker than hell. And so f-ing down about a lot of stuff. Had a couple of auditions, got cast in a piece of shit play, but got totally screwed over by a really bad script, and a director that doesn't have a clue how to do her job, for which I professionally and quickly dropped out. Just commemorated my mom's 10th anniversary of her death. Stuck at a low paying job with no prospects in the immediate future. Ocean Park is about to fuck me over again, I think. Dumbass chinks. Trying not to be a victim, but circumstances make it hard not to fall into that hole. It is so hard to climb out of a hole when you've been kicked repeatedly. I mean, why bother to get up?
Then there's politics. The federal budget debate hung up by a bunch of mis-informed idiots, that think that Planned Parenthood funds abortion, even though that aspect of PP's operations is not funded by the federal government. The Tea Partiers -- or should I say Tea Baggers, named after sucking one's ejaculation out of a condom -- think they have free run over determining public policy. Sarah Palin should win "Righteous Cunt of the Year" for running her mouth. Then our dumbass governor decides its a good thing not to build light rail, and blindly cutting the budget, then has the audacity to claim credit for helping out in the federal budget impasse. And Obama needs to grow a pair.
Nonetheless, this is what you've missed thus far. It's safe to assume that I don't feel all that great about things right now.
06 February 2011
Zombie Drew
Me on the set of a Full Sail production. I was playing a zombie that got his head shot off. Alan did the prosthetic makeup on it, as well as the head that actually did get shot. I hear that shooting 'my head' was pretty interesting. The first shot, the guy missed. The second, the guy hit my chest, but not affecting the body double in the least. Finally, I got shot in the neck, and my head went flying off. I can't wait to see the footage, both raw and edited.
A month without Palin?
Apparently February was proposed to be a "Month Without Sarah Palin".
However, she's telling us on the centennial of Ronald Reagan's birthday, that we as a nation, are going in the wrong direction.
There's evidence that the former President was suffering the initial stages of Alzheimer's. Palin, like her idol Reagan, are delusional.
She needs to learn how to talk, thinking first then speaking. She needs to learn how to make her words mean something to the right people, and not her fans. That cunt might not go away, but at least she can be intelligent while playing the part.
However, she's telling us on the centennial of Ronald Reagan's birthday, that we as a nation, are going in the wrong direction.
There's evidence that the former President was suffering the initial stages of Alzheimer's. Palin, like her idol Reagan, are delusional.
She needs to learn how to talk, thinking first then speaking. She needs to learn how to make her words mean something to the right people, and not her fans. That cunt might not go away, but at least she can be intelligent while playing the part.
Now that the world is distracted....
With the Egypt debaucle, and my blood pressure has gone down.... I can retract my angry statement "A good Republican is a dead one."
I just am amazed at the ineptness and ignorance that the GOP operates under. The original GOP stood for the exact opposite of what they do now. Look at Lincoln. But he was assassinated, so I guess, that was where the shift in ideology began.
Now they're cutting federal departments whilst keeping the Congressional budget intact. And in the same token, they're probably going to keep their federal health benefits, while they try to destroy the health reforms we fought for.
If successful, it will be the health care industry that benefits, not the John and Jane Smiths that depend on accessible medical care to keep them alive and maintain the quality of life they need to continue to contribute to helping our country recover and grow.
But I digress. So what do the changes do our Republican lawmakers do for John and Jane Smith? Though I concede in advance, they will do some good, I believe they will not be helpful for what our nation needs. They will be fighting tooth and nail to perpetuate partisan politics and totally go against what most of them have pledged to do.
Like I describe guys who like to flaunt their social conquests, they are all talk and no go. And the GOP is no different.
I just am amazed at the ineptness and ignorance that the GOP operates under. The original GOP stood for the exact opposite of what they do now. Look at Lincoln. But he was assassinated, so I guess, that was where the shift in ideology began.
Now they're cutting federal departments whilst keeping the Congressional budget intact. And in the same token, they're probably going to keep their federal health benefits, while they try to destroy the health reforms we fought for.
If successful, it will be the health care industry that benefits, not the John and Jane Smiths that depend on accessible medical care to keep them alive and maintain the quality of life they need to continue to contribute to helping our country recover and grow.
But I digress. So what do the changes do our Republican lawmakers do for John and Jane Smith? Though I concede in advance, they will do some good, I believe they will not be helpful for what our nation needs. They will be fighting tooth and nail to perpetuate partisan politics and totally go against what most of them have pledged to do.
Like I describe guys who like to flaunt their social conquests, they are all talk and no go. And the GOP is no different.
11 January 2011
2010 Cher You Haven't Seen The Last Of Me Video Preview
This song is so touching. It's a bitter reminder of where I'm at in life. I'm not going away. I'm trying to find a better vehicle to catapult me over the obstacles. As they taught us in acting class, keep trying to satisfy the objective by changing tactics. Which is what I'm doing, though paralyzed by many factors that I have no idea how to overcome.
08 January 2011
OK, so I'll be more polite
I hate what the House has turned into: a forum for reactionaries who have no regard to the rule of law, and instead have reverted to mob rule as a means of governance. Shame on them, and the stupid voters that let them govern on their behalf.
06 January 2011
02 January 2011
The New House
I preface this by saying: A good republican is a dead republican.
I resent the agenda that the Republican dominated house is setting. Don't force your opinions down our throats, just like you all have done in the past 30 years. I do not care for your politics, policies and your agendas.
Why do you insist on undoing what was done in the past year? This is so counterproductive and a waste of everyone's time. You make me sick. All of you.
I know that you as a whole have done some good for this nation. Can't sincerely think of what that good was. Honestly, you all suck.
I will be fighting you all the way. Using the resources available to me, I will make sure you regret you were ever elected.
Again a good Republican is a dead one.
I resent the agenda that the Republican dominated house is setting. Don't force your opinions down our throats, just like you all have done in the past 30 years. I do not care for your politics, policies and your agendas.
Why do you insist on undoing what was done in the past year? This is so counterproductive and a waste of everyone's time. You make me sick. All of you.
I know that you as a whole have done some good for this nation. Can't sincerely think of what that good was. Honestly, you all suck.
I will be fighting you all the way. Using the resources available to me, I will make sure you regret you were ever elected.
Again a good Republican is a dead one.
Banished words
Interesting list this year. Eclectic and encompassing all areas of US slang.
The news article:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20101231/od_nm/us_banished_words
The actual list:
http://www.lssu.edu/banished/current.php
The news article:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20101231/od_nm/us_banished_words
The actual list:
http://www.lssu.edu/banished/current.php
01 January 2011
From the Dalai Lama
Compassion creates a positive, friendly atmosphere. With such an attitude, you can create the possibility of receiving affection or a positive response from someone else. If the other person doesn't respond to you in a positive way, your own feeling of openness gives you the flexibility and freedom to change your approach as needed and still allows for the possibility of having a meaningful conversation with them.
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